Scottsdale Bars
Posted June 30th, 2008My buddy lives in Scottsdale and swears it’s true. I know I’ve seen some of these t-bags in Jersey too…
Where the Hell is Matt?
Posted June 24th, 2008If this doesn’t make you smile, you might be dead. Be sure to click on the ‘watch in high quality’ link below the video. It’s really sharp…
Conan O’Brien’s Commencement at Harvard
Posted June 23rd, 2008Conan O’Brien’s Commencement at Harvard
I’m not a huge Conan fan but this is hilarious.
Yahoo! Resigner
Posted June 23rd, 2008This is the fucking funniest thing I’ve seen in a long time. Be sure to submit and check out the email subject. LOL!
Excuses
Posted June 18th, 2008Track star: Well, yeah, I’ve always hated that official, but I sure didn’t mean for my javelin to go right through his spleen like that!
Announcer: But you’re a sprinter.
Decisions, decisions…
Posted June 15th, 2008If it had to be one or the other, I’m glad it’s Richard Dawkins who joined Twitter and Tim Russert who dropped dead.
Walk the Talk
Posted June 12th, 2008I was looking for information on a SEO company that was recommended to me but I couldn’t find them on Google.
— Me
Best Book Review EVER!
Posted June 12th, 2008“The lamp’s glow was very weak compared to the blue glow emancipating from the basement.”
Tech Bubble? There’s No Tech Bubble!
Posted June 11th, 2008
Words to Live By
Posted June 5th, 2008No matter how delicately one approaches the task, there is no telling off a Frenchwoman.
Acrobat
Posted May 30th, 2008Editing text in Adobe Acrobat Professional is like fucking in glass sheets.
SO true!
Kite Flying Mecca
Posted May 30th, 2008
Of course if you flew a kite there, you might end up in Montana…
Razor or TP?
Posted May 30th, 2008
Which one do you think created those reactions? A need for a razor or toilet paper?
Take Cover
Posted May 27th, 2008
Maybe they think the hunters won’t shoot when there are kids present…
What’s More Than a Friend?
Posted May 26th, 2008Brunette: I really need to have sex.
Blonde: Well you better do it soon because you’re getting your period on Wednesday.
[long pause.]
Brunette: We spend too much time together.
Hook ‘em When Their Young
Posted May 25th, 2008[Mother and four-year-old boy walking past liquor store]
Mom: So we have to go to Duane Reade and… Oooh! Let’s get some wine.
Boy: Yeah!
It’ll Make Sense When You’re Older
Posted May 24th, 2008Little boy: …I met another girl at school who is Mexican!
Mother: Colombian! We’re Colombian!
At Least He’s Honest
Posted May 24th, 2008Tourist husband with camera: We could ask him. [Points to black man.]
Tourist wife: No, I don’t think thats a good idea.
Black man: Listen to your woman, I woulda taken that shit and run!
See You at Thanksgiving?
Posted May 22nd, 2008Chick #1: You were way too hard on my dad back there.
Chick #2: I know, I’m sorry… I just get so heated.
Chick #1: Still, “homophobic asshole” is a little harsh, don’t you think?
Flying Penis
Posted May 20th, 2008
In the middle of Kasparov’s speech no less. Doesn’t anyone have any respect left for an International Chess Grand Master turned politician?
Quoted by Julia Allison
Posted May 17th, 2008Wow, I answer a simple question and now I’m famous. LOL!
Must’ve Failed Catechism
Posted May 17th, 2008Mom, reading about unicorns to ten-year-old son: The unicorn was a symbol of Christ, its head in the virgin Mary’s lap…
Son: Wait, wait, wait! Mary was a virgin?!
— Overheard in New York at Museum of Natural History, Mythic Creatures Exhibit
